most beautiful site i have ever seen

most beautiful site i have ever seen

(via connorfranta)



I want to prove to Connor and everyone that we will stick with Connor forever!


The danger of being lonely is that you easily fall for the very first person who shows you that you are not alone.

Self Harm

Your life sucks.

I know that.

You don’t deserve this life.

I think there is a big storm in your life.

You don’t know what is causing this storm.

I do.

The storm is


those people that hurt you

they are

mother nature

You’re the puppet that always listens to mother nature

cut your strings so you can be your own mother nature

and control yourself.

Don’t make the storm start again.

I love you. 


Isn’t it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet?

Losing Weight

A huge part of losing weight is believing you can do it and realizing it’s not going to happen over night.

You go home,
And you cry,
And you want to die.

Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who to be?


You don’t know pain until you’re staring at yourself in the mirror with tears streaming down your face and you’re begging yourself to just hold on and be strong.

That is pain. 

Her lips say no

But her eyes say that she will spend the next half-hour locked in a filthy bathroom stall
Crying on her knees and praying to God that you wont find her
That she can make it home without you in the folds of her back pocket


She shouldn’t have worn that dress, shouldn’t have worn that dress, shouldn’t have—

Her eyes say that yours make her go rigid in fear.

Her lips say no
But her throat says that she shouldn’t have spoken
Especially when it clenches around her stuttered,broken apology,

“No sir,
I don’t want to hold myself against you sir
No I don’t come here often sir because this always—”

Her throat says that she’s never sucked a dick in her life and she doesn’t want to start on the piss-soaked pavement behind the bar
That she can already feel the trap of your hands that burn like scars
That she shouldn’t have worn that dress

Her lips say no
But this dress shows the wrists that dragged her into a parked Chevy last year
Says that she could’t leave her room for a month because everything was too heavy last year
And those faded pink scars are the stars that went out that night
Hasn’t been out like this in more months than she can count on the tally marks on her arms

Her stomach says that she wants to vomit across your shoes

Her lips are bitten raw

Her lips say no
But her body says that she’s panicked and shrunken and sweating like you’re already on her
Like you’re already clipping back the stem that has helped her grow like a flower
Her body says that she hasn’t felt alive
Hasn’t felt whole since that night
Hasn’t been anything but this since that night
Wished more times that she can count on the tally marks on her arms that
Her body had died with her soul that night

Her body says that she shouldn’t be here
That she’s walked down so many streets with her keys tucked between her middle and ring fingers
Please, please don’t touch me again
Her body had memorized the posture of distrust
Her body doesn’t trust you, doesn’t want you, says
“God, get away from me now before I
Break into a million pieces
Before I
Die on the stench of your breath.”

Her dress hangs off of her frame like death and
Tells you she’s asking for it
When she’s asking God in a whisper
Is this happening

What did I do, What did I do, What did I do wrong I don’t want this.

Her lips say no
But her hips don’t want to be touched
Have already been bruised by
Anger, anger, anger
Flooding through her veins and she hasn’t
Healed since that night hasn’t
sang since that night
wore a hoodie and jeans that night and still
Chokes every day on the hope that someday they won’t be screaming
you deserved it.
She could’ve been
Cloaked in wool that night could have been
Shrouded in purity that night and still he tore through her like she was naked
Left her bleeding a bruised and naked and
She never asked for this
Never wanted this

Her father said she never should’ve
Bared her wings to the sky and
Now she’s a dead bird with two eyes still open
Her hips recoiling from your hands because hers are
Shaking, quaking
She doesn’t want you
Her lips say no and her hips say no and she’s wondering what your mamma told you
Who what why they made you think that that the no on her lips means
Take me, make me, tear me down


She still feels him on her shoulders
Still wont let no one hold her
Still wakes up screaming from the pain in limbs she feels she doesn’t have


Tonight she’s fire and wind and ever jet that cuts scars across the sky
Tonight she’s more than a bird
Tonight she’s a monster

Tonight she’s not anyone’s
whore slut good girl


When she says
don’t fucking touch me or I’ll scream
It’s punctuated by her knuckles on your jaw

Tonight it’s breathed like fire from her mouth and
For the first time your eyes aren’t the same color as his
Tonight she’s not trapped in the sea of her bedsheets or
Drowning in a lake of her trauma

Tonight you wont win
Tonight he wont win
Tonight when she says no she

Sips her drink and laughs
and says

Her lips say no

She says


poem inspired by Andrea Gibson’s “Blue Blanket


(via wylderwolfy)